Regardless if you’re doing it consciously or not. At least some people seem to be. And, ironically enough, it’s always the people who are vehemently opposed to the idea that seem to be doing it the most. I realize it’s ridiculous for me to pass judgment on people, but everyone does it from time to time, and I’m doing it here assuming that my readership is aware that I expect most things I say on this blog thing to be taken lightly, or at the very least with a grain of salt. I think sometimes people mistakenly assume that when I say things on here, I speak of them as universal truths — but that is not the case. I’m really just talking out of my ass and I hope you all realize that. Okay. Enough with the disclaimers.
You see that guy in the coffeehouse with the thick-framed glasses, unkempt beard, skinny jeans, ironic or v-neck t-shirt, a Kafka (or Nietzsche, or Palahniuk, or Hunter S. Thompson) book, a moleskine, a macbook (playing Animal Collective, or MGMT, or Beirut, or Andrew Bird) with a fixed gear bicycle parked outside? I can almost guarantee you that his tastes are the result of a contradiction. He probably enjoys half of those things because a) he wants to be off the beaten path; unique, different, independent, but also b) because it was smashed into his brain by all of his peers and all of the people he looks up to that those things are what’s cool. See the contradiction here? A simultaneous distaste for conformity and undying need to fit in (with the people he desires).
Now, maybe he’s doing this unknowingly. Maybe he doesn’t realize it. Or, maybe he even enjoys all of those things, and discovered them on his own. But, to me, that seems incredibly unlikely. And on the off chance that’s true, that brings about a very sad realization: other people will see him donning his tastes and use them to discern whether or not he is a) one of them, or b) not one of them. All of those tastes fit incredibly nicely into a stereotype — can you imagine how confusing it would be for passerby to make quick assumptions about him if he were wearing a death-metal t-shirt, regular glasses, moccasins, reading a christian self-help book and listening to ’30s jazz? He wouldn’t fit into any stereotype. Part of me is beginning to wonder if the whole taste-based identity/conformity/non-comformity/whatever thing is all a result of some strange primal herd mentality.
I think everyone, to a degree, is guilty of trying to fit into something. The upper middle-class suburbanite who finds it necessary to buy this van and this house on this street because it’s what all the other respectable suburbanites are doing. The lower-class rural dude who finds it necessary to own a jacked up Jeep, because all of his cool friends have one. The college fraternity member who finds it necessary to wear popped-collar polo shirts and say “bro” because all of his awesome buddies do it? Even me. While I try to avoid any sort of conformity, it’d be ridiculous to say that half of the things I enjoy or adorn myself with weren’t chosen by me because I saw someone else with those things and wanted to assimilate myself with them. Or because I liked the idea of them.
Honestly, I wouldn’t think anything would be inherently wrong with this if it weren’t for one thing — when someone broadens their horizons, or enjoys or fancies things that don’t fit a stereotype (or that fit a stereotype that is totally different than what one would expect from them), people automatically see that and it makes them uncomfortable. Two people can carry a conversation about cars, but if the conversation turns to music, and someone mentions that they love Fleetwood Mac, if the other person is all about alternative rock, they immediately feel uncomfortable. And this makes me really sad. It makes me sad because this whole dynamic trains people to stay within their stereotype. It limits people from reaching out and looking for other things that they very well might enjoy if they weren’t so close-minded. If you’re a semi-truck driver and you listen to a certain type of music and wear a certain type of clothing, and you’re mostly around other semi-truck drivers who listen to the same music and wear the same clothing, chances are if someone were to show you an Animal Collective song (haha), you’d dislike that. But would you dislike it because it actually bothers you, or because it’s different? What’s the ratio? I imagine it’s slanted toward the latter. Would you like it if you were alone and gave it a chance?
I think the world would truly be a better place if people could see the differences between each other and, rather than trying to ignore them, or viewing them negatively (because they’re differences), appreciate (or, at the very least, acknowledge and respect) them. Immortal Technique says in one of his songs “there’s no diversity because we’re burning in the melting pot”, and I’m really fond of that line. I don’t want to live in a melting pot. I want to live in a pot with a bunch of different shit, and I want all the shit to respect each other and love each other (even though the shit’s different). And I’ve obviously been rambling far too long, and this post has gone way past ridiculous. And I realize I’ve probably contradicted myself a lot, but you know what? I’m just carelessly vomiting my thoughts, and I’m doing it because it’s therapeutic for me, and I hope no one takes offense at my thoughts. There was supposed to be some giant point I was going to make, but I lost it, and it’s late, and I’m going to bed. I hope you all have a wonderful night/morning.
